


Daddy I have sinned

by Koifish09



Category: Ancient Greek Religion & Lore, sky daddy fandom
Genre: God - Freeform, Lecherous Zeus (Ancient Greek Religion & Lore), Other, WAP, bigdaddy, hottiemicflotty, oneshots, pisskinkforjesus, please i wanna die, read some sky daddy x y/n fic, whores
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-16
Updated: 2021-02-18
Packaged: 2021-03-13 21:21:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28784865
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Koifish09/pseuds/Koifish09
Summary: sky daddy jesus and ugly ass zeus meet
Relationships: zeus/god
Comments: 2
Kudos: 9





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> i am not fixing the spelling mistakes this was wrote in three hours and for everyones fun. Please for the love of every other god touch some grass and get away from the damn phone you little slut.
> 
> Switching between Jesus and Zeus pov at random points. 
> 
> also Jesus non-binary?  
> and exposing zeus for the shitty person he is?  
> Yes i say yes

As sky daddy Jesus praises down on me as our worlds meet i have never felt such touch such life. Hera my wife, and sister never felt like this all the women i was with never felt like this. damn all i want to do is whip them like how Romans did, nail them to the cross how his father wanted. Would God ever let me? I would never know because me and them are apart of different worlds, Jesus leading over the Christians and Catholics, me and my family leading over the Pagans and Wiccans, would our worlds ever get to meet?

It's been three days since i last seen Jesus..Hera is asking why i haven't been out with other women, She's getting worried, but how can she not be worried when i look like this and have my huge lighting pp. All i wanna do is crucify Jesus how they did in 33 A.D Golgotha..But would Jesus ever allow me oh well if they didn't i would just take him like how i took Hera, or would they like that? I would never want to hurt my Jesuswesse.

Today i pissed my bed like the little piss baby I am, Hera ran away and took the kid, Good i didn't even want them i beat and hurt them enough like the shitty father I am..Would Jesus ever like that? Would Jesus want me to hurt my ugly stupid children?? I would get on my knees and pray to the holy bible for them, but would they? I hope they would or i would get them romans on them. Not to hurt them of corse but to see him pinned up on that seggsy cross *smirk emoji*. 

Jesus talked to me today Their mouth was moving so seggsy like it was so hot and that beard that smells like Satans ass hole ughhh so hot....

Zeus talked to me today the god of lightning talked to me today!! I can't believe it holy Shit ,Opp- forgive me heavenly father for i have sinned Amen.  
But damn that massive lighning sholng got me acting up,,He said Hi to me today and damn his voice does give me incest vibes, Hot, Daddy god said i couldn't be with him because he apparently is dating his sister but I think I could change that...I mean His wife already left him because he pissed the bed like the pissbaby he is..Damn for sure would let him crucify me for the second time he's so fucking hot like damn papi tie me up and call me fake how the romans did, wip me like before my crucifixion, hide me in those rocks of an ass.

Why can't Zeus just marry me already, is he scared? Is he being a little piss baby? Why would he ever even look at me like that if he didn't want marriage, my father already gave him the blessings so why can't he stop being a little pissbaby? I had bible study with my mother and father today that was fun but i could never stop thinking about zeus and how many people he's been with before and how they should all burn for being little sluts   
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

It's been a week since I last spoke to Jesus, their hair was looking as dandreathy as it could and damn that was seggsy their little lice jumping in and out of his hair and onto this their satans ass hole beard it was so hot I wanted to eat them up like it was the gifts my slav- people bringed to me like the nice freshly picked grapes they bestowed upon me and the children they murdered for me as a blessing. I wanted to strike down Jesus letting them know that i love them but they just took it as a sign of me wanting death, so the very next day they raised the water on my people, thankfully they all died do to drowning.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fucking piss kinks, Zeus actually misses hera this chapter??? fucking other shit too, drunk Zeus and jesus, somehow the virgin marry is somewhat involved???

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey lol please kill me I hate it here more then you do probably

Jesus woke up with their hips sore looking to right remembering what happened last night, the night where they ran 30 miles and doing a lot of push ups and stuff. So when they seen zeus in the bed they where confused on how he ended up on their bed then they somewhat remembered what happened, hara left him with the kids and zeus needed a friend to comfort him so jesus took that role and had a drink with him, but how were they both naked and why the fuck was the so called "huge lightning pp" so fucking small, same size as a safety scissors looking ass it looked like it was hit by a train track looking ass never took a shower ass always so sweaty dumb ass can't take a joke and gets so mad over everything looking ass making me want to hit him with a train looking ass should probably get some water with his dehydrated ass. Then they remembered they fucked that nasty ass, what the fuck were they thinking fucking someone that was in to that incest shit, Then the memories flooded to their brain, the pissing- (no nvm I'm-sorry I can't right now)

they called marry crying confessing what they did and marry failed to tears crying trying to comfort jesus the best way that she could but jesus virginity was the most important to them and marry they had that special bond that they thought would never be broken but jesus knew it was about time to get married and shit   
so the next day jesus proposed to that small dick of a man, they got down on a knee just how shit zeus smelled, he smelled of left over season less chicken that was growing some type of mold but who knew.. But jesus couldn't be hypercritical theur damn beard smelled like Satan's ass hole with double the caca, and lets not talk about the gown they always wear only gets watched once every 10 years and it smells like pp all the time.  
So when jesus gets down on one knee for zeus, only from him to slap them and beat them straight up just jump them and steal the ring goes onto thinking why jesus did that maybe it was to early, maybe it was the fact that the ring was only a little sliver band or that he needed time to think of it.

So when Jesus seen zeus the next day with hera this time jesus was in raged but they seen hera handing him something and that was omg{sparkle emoji}divorce papers{sparkle emojis} jesus eyes fluttered with excitement and then seeing zeus burst into tears made them laugh their ass off (as they should) and when zeus seen jesus staring at them and looking like they where about to die, good zeus thought to himself they smelled like a dumpster with a really tiny pp, hope they choked on their own breath lol,

Zeus what the fuck I'm literally divorcing you and you're over there just smiling and laughing, I bet you're in you head thinking about those damn sults you slept with. I am so glad you got off on them though you smell like shit all the fucking time and are so fucking small same size as a baby carrot ass, and it's so funny because you proclaim yourself as the "the huge lighting pp"  
I am though hera, its just that your eyesight is so bad. You literally are so fucking ugly I bet your choochie smells like shit and blood all the fucking time you dumb stank bitch.  
this is why i am divorcing your dumbass you eat shit all the fucking time  
thats why you couldn't marry anyone else beside me you dumb bitch  
i- YOU KIDNAPED ME- bye  
I hope you drown in your tears hera  
I hope you die in a big pit of fire  
Hera please don't do this...I'll miss you..  
Good. I won't  
please hera-  
bye bitch

Wow that was quite the show you put on zeus.  
Fuck you jesus by the way the ring you brought me was really cheep, almost as cheep as your religion   
i- give me a god damn second-  
no you look like shit all the time, plus why the fuck do people trust a book WITH PAGE NUMBERS  
I-i don't know  
eat ass you ugly piece of shit

**Author's Note:**

> Kill me ban me from here i hate it take away my rights i don't deserve them give them away sell them just put a bounty on me i don't care do what ever.. I did this besides english homework i'm failing fucking English for this bullshit


End file.
